Art of Self-Confidence and how to Sustain it
By Sulakshana Viswanathan on 2017-01-26
My article on self-confidence is solely based on my own inference. While the net world throws a lot of articles and posters on self-confidence, I write this small article based on how I see self-confidence. You may beg to differ and can write to me about your feedback.
Out of all the 10 questions asked, she is asked “As a marketing person, what would you do if you market a wrong product and customer threatens to file a case against your business, and your future is at stake?”
Rita is shaken over this question and is almost shivering while she whispers “I would analyze the situation, speak to my boss, and calm the customer”.
The interviewer looks at her for a second with piercing eyes and asks “And if you are fired for the mistake you did, how would you handle the situation?” Again perplexed, Rita answers saying “I would fight to prove myself, maybe cry a little and ask my father to help me for my future”.
The interviewer tells Rita that he will get back to her soon with the result. While the same interview is attended by another candidate named Pragati and she is asked the same questions. While Pragati is academically not so brilliant, her answer was “I will analyze the root cause of the issue faced by the customer, speak to calm him down or give a refund. I am not perfect and when I am fired for the mistake I will check the market to find another job for myself”.
Based on this hypothetical situation, the interviewer provides the offer letter to the second candidate Pragati and informs the first candidate Rita that she lacks self-confidence.
Is this correct selection? From my standpoint, self-confidence is “believing in yourself and your capabilities”. Being bold is not self-confidence. If Rita was selected, she may have handled 6 out of 10 customer queries better being a studious person. She may have struggled only in the most difficult situations. Well, to handle these most difficult situations, is the reason why managers with experience are recruited.
Pragati on the other hand would perhaps make a good authoritative manager for customer escalations being a tough person, but she may need a lot of training to handle customer knowledge support as compared to the first candidate.
With this example, I want to emphasize that Self-Confidence is usually mistaken for being bold and making a lot of noise in difficult scenarios. No, rather self-confidence is how a person sees himself, how a person feels about himself, how he assertively believes that in spite of failures I am good and someone will show the path to me. The word “Self” indicates Me. Only when you believe in yourself others can believe in you.
When you are self-confident, you face situations with a good attitude and will slowly climb the ladder of success. Self-confidence helps you to overcome depressions, mental stress, suicidal tendencies, anger, and other negative behaviors.
In case of Rita, she may have been vulnerable due to her studious attitude in attending an annoying customer, and she may still believe that she is good in her work and there will be someone who will hire her for a good job. This is self-confidence which is coupled with patience. However if she commits to any negative action due to constant failure even after being a good student, then she needs a lot of motivation to understand self-confidence. She would need a mentor to help her identify her strengths again and bring back the confidence in herself.
Very few people are born with self-confidence, while the majority of people believe in their social status quo and succumb to failures. The only method in bringing back the self-confidence into every individual is by identifying one mentor or well–wisher, who will guide them to identify their strengths during every failed moments. It can even be their mother or teacher or their brother or it can be you.